Well I am now officially, well and truly shitting my pants. The hospital have just called me and given me a date for my pre-op assessment on the 16th July and the date for the actual procedure on the 21st of July at the royal London. I am more nervous than a sex offender at a nudist beach. On the one hand its good because it gets it over and done with and I can get back on track to having some kind of normal life. On the other hand, I just really am not looking forward to the whole series of events, being cut open, catheters etc. I’m not particularly vain at all but I keep looking at myself in a mirror and realise that, well in 10 days time, I won’t look like that ever again. Not that it’s a bad thing, just different. I don’t know, maybe on some level I am resentful, why me? etc. but you can’t sit around and bitch and moan otherwise that’s all we would spend our lives doing. Time to get my head down and crack on.
“Courage is not the absence of fear but the judgment that something else is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever but the cautious do not live at all. For now you are traveling the road between who you think you are and who you can be.”